Blaming your partner for being boring or demanding is a copout. You wouldn't have decided to marry him if he hadn't been engaging and sweet in the past. This can be reclaimed with renewed focus on your marriage. These husbands don't appear to be jerks. They appear to be fine. You didn't write to me to complain about your dreadful marriage. You only wrote to me when a new man appeared.
Before You Continue...
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The first reader wonders if it is ever appropriate to leave a spouse for another. I believe you should divorce your spouse because he or she is a jerk. It's a decent decision to leave your husband if he's absolutely nasty, if you despise him, if he beats you or abuses the kids. However, abandoning a decent guy to take a chance on someone else rarely results in the happy ending you expect. The second reader has a question: “How do you know if a relationship is worth the danger, the stress, and the pain?” In your instance, you are not willing to give up your single status in order to pursue a relationship with an available man. There's a lot you're giving up for very little reward.
Are you willing to give up a stable family, a house, and a place to call home? Are you getting a hazy promise from a man who must also give up something similar? Who knows if he'll alter his mind or not. Who do you think would resent you for ending his marriage? Who decides how much it costs to be a homewrecker? In a few years, who do you think will become bored?
You say that this man's feelings are complicated “less intense” than yours, to use a phrase. You appear to be living a fiction, in my opinion. You also claim that none of you wants to divorce. You, on the other hand, say your marriage has been rocky for a long time, which seems contradictory. I'm curious if you'd say this if it weren't for this titillating new man acting as a catalyst.
Does a soulmate have to be your spouse?
Someone who comes into your life to teach, push, and transcend you into a higher state of consciousness and being is known as a soulmate. A life mate is someone you can trust and rely on for the rest of your life. Friends or even family can introduce you to your soulmate.
How do you know he will leave his wife?
A long-term relationship isn't fair to anyone. It's not on you, and it's certainly not on his wife.
However, if you've only recently met or started sleeping together, he's unlikely to leave his wife for you.
There's only a possibility it'll turn into anything real if he decides to keep the affair going and actually get to know you.
Just keep in mind that the longer it goes on, the more harm it may cause to everyone involved.
He's been taking risks.
He's been erring on the side of caution lately when it comes to keeping things between you under wraps. He's been doing things that put his wife's safety in jeopardy.
That could indicate that he's secretly hoping she'll leave him so that everything blow up and he can leave her.
He lacks the courage to tell her that he has been unfaithful and that he is leaving her.
So, despite the fact that things would almost certainly turn out badly for him, he's hoping things will simply come to a head and he'll never have to have the confidence to sit her down for that chat.
Should I tell my spouse I love someone else?
Developing feelings for someone can be a wonderful, exciting time â or the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Especially if you're interested in or in a relationship with the persona you're interested in, or if you're in a relationship yourself. Knowing you have affections for someone else, unless you're poly, can be unsettling and guilt-inducing. Worse than realizing you're having these feelings is realizing you need to talk to your partner about it.
It's a challenge, but it's true. Whether it's just a crush or more serious feelings, whether you've expressed them or not, you should talk to them. First, you must sort out and decide for yourself a few things, and then you must open up about the problem. Remember, it doesn't always spell the end of a relationship, but it's worth having that talk to evaluate if your current relationship isn't providing you with what you need. Or perhaps you've just realized that polyamory is a good fit for you. In any case, it begins with an open and honest discussion.
Because you must first understand your own thinking, here are some guidelines for talking to your partner about feelings for someone else:
What does it feel like to marry your soulmate?
Marriages between soulmates can be happy, passionate, and healthy. Working together, soulmate lovers can easily accomplish a lot. Couples that are soul mates typically take pleasure in watching each other grow. A soul mate will accept you for who you are, will challenge you, and will be your closest friend.
Is a soulmate true love?
Here's the thing: the concept of a soulmate is incredibly romanticas long as you're with someone you adore and who makes you feel incredible. The concept of soulmates can lead us to believe that once we discover our match, everything would be flawless and easywhich is not the case in real life.
Can you have a toxic relationship with your soulmate?
Many people misunderstand the term “soulmate,” thinking it simply means “the person you love” or “the person you're marrying.”
But the truth is that finding or meeting your soulmate is a completely different emotion and experience than simply being with someone you love, as those of you who have found or met your soulmate will attest.
Not only have you gone head over heals in love with your soulmate, but you also have this connection that you sense on an intellectual, spiritual, or emotional level. Many people find it challenging to put into words how they feel. Your soulmate, on the other hand, has your full heart and the relationship is far more intense than a normal one. This person is not just your other half, but they're also the only person who truly understands you, the one person who makes you feel at ease and as if you've known them for many lifetimes (which your soul has). You can't picture life without this person, but the saddest part is when you and your soulmate are simply not meant to be together in this life. Not yet, at least. Perhaps you will be in the future life. However, you've tried everything and the relationship is now toxic.
The heartache of saying goodbye to a soulmate is almost intolerable. It's like an ordinary breakup, but a hundred times more dramatic and emotionally destructive as if a piece of yourself dies when that person leaves your life.
After you and your soulmate discover you're not destined to be together in this incarnation, life goes on like this:
You find love again, but it'll never feel the same.
Yes, you will fall in love again, possibly marry, and go on to live a happy and fulfilled life. Even so, there will always be a sense that something is missing. You can't quite put your finger on it, but you occasionally feel a void that isn't being filled, regardless of how happy your life or new relationship is. It's a part of you that you can't get to. It's as though no matter how long it's been since you and your soulmate broke up, it never goes away. Love never feels the same the second time around. You know it deep down in your heart, whether you confess it or not.
No matter how many years go by, you still think about the memories.
It will always be tough to let go of the memories. You'll tend to replay those memories in your thoughts a lot, especially if you're going through a difficult period in your life. Your thoughts will always stray back to that spot, back to that time you were together, and back to that life you once enjoyed that no longer exists in the present, no matter how many years pass. You'll have odd flashbacks, which will sometimes appear out of nowhere. But, whether it's pleasant or horrible memories, you'll always remember them. It's the only thing you have left of them.
You become an entirely different person.
When you and your soulmate part ways, a piece of you dies. You never feel the same way twice. You change a lot about yourself, notably the way you deal with heartfelt topics like dating and love. It's as if the loss's sorrow corrupted you from the inside out, altering your life as you knew it.
The line “They will love the better you, but I still hold the ghost of you” from Sam Smith's song “Palace” is a perfect example of this. You just adopt a whole different persona, a mere phantom of yourself, and live a completely different life. However, most people prefer this version of you since you've learned and grown so much since then, and you can see things more clearly today. Even if you've gone through a lot of agony to get here, you might miss some aspects of your old self now and then.
You might question all the “bad that happened.
The issue is, if you're not with your soulmate despite trying everything you can to make it work, it's probably because things have gotten poisonous or unhealthy. The intensity of being with a soulmate can frequently lead to numerous disputes and arguments, which can quickly devolve into something unpleasant and destructive. However, as time passes and you gain more distance from all of this, you begin to notice all of it “wrong” in a new light. You begin to wonder if some of that is true “if the “bad” were all your fault, or if you might have managed things differently. You could wonder how horrible things were in the first place, or if you simply overreacted at the time.
They still appear in your dreams.
Years and years may pass, but your soulmate will continue to emerge in your dreams. It's how your subconscious mind and spirit cope with the fact that your soulmate is no longer at your side in this world. You may be completely fine with this fact in regular life, yet the agony still persists unconsciously.
You will settle into your new life, but your soul will always carry this person with you.
You'll move on, you'll have fun, you'll go on adventures, and you'll live. But, in some way, they will always be a part of you. Their presence, their memories – you'll carry them all with you in your heart and spirit. You and your soulmate will reunite in another life when everything is meant to be, and it will be magical. But in the meantime, live life to the fullest. Love with all of your heart. Take a trip around the globe. Make an effort to succeed. And strive to be the best version of yourself.




