Do I Need A Spiritual Director

Consider hiring a spiritual director if you wish to progress in your faith and spiritual life. Spiritual directors assist people examine issues of the soul, faith, and God by leading them on their spiritual journeys. Spiritual guidance is a practice that can be found in a variety of religious systems.

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How do I know if I need a spiritual director?

You may already have a good relationship with your priest and feel comfortable asking him to be your spiritual director, but even if you don't, it's appropriate to ask him.

Because many parish priests are overburdened with responsibilities, it may be more effective to ask, “Is there someone you can recommend to give me spiritual direction if you are unable?”

Not only does this relieve your parish priest of stress, but it also prevents you from being disappointed if he is unable to serve as your spiritual director—and it allows him to consider making a recommendation for you.

When a good friend asked her parish priest to be her spiritual director, he was unable to do so, but he offered her the names of two other priests in her diocese who were available for spiritual direction! She was quite appreciative.

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Our pastor or another priest, our confessor (the priest from whom we receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation on a regular basis), a religious (monk, friar, or nun), or an experienced and well-formed lay person could all serve as spiritual directors.

The Catholic Church's Catechism says this about seeking and finding a spiritual director:

For the sake of the common good, which is prayer, the Holy Spirit bestows the gifts of wisdom, faith, and insight on a select group of believers (spiritual direction). Men and women with such gifts are worthy servants of prayer's living tradition.

According to St. John of the Cross, anyone seeking perfection should “take care into whose hands they entrust themselves,” because “as the master is, so will the disciple be, and as the parent is, so will the son.” ‘A spiritual director should be experienced in addition to being learned and discreet… If the spiritual director has no experience of the spiritual life, he will be unable of leading the souls whom God is calling to it into it, and he will not even understand them.'

Do Catholics need a spiritual director?

Spiritual direction has its origins in the early Christian church. According to the gospels, Jesus acted as a mentor to his disciples. In addition, Ananias is described in Acts of the Apostles Chapter 9 as assisting Paul of Tarsus in growing in his newfound faith. Similarly, Paul is described as mentoring Timothy and Titus, among others, in various Pauline epistles. Polycarp, the 2nd-century bishop of Smyrna, is said to have been instructed by John the Evangelist.

John Cassian, a fourth-century theologian, wrote some of the first known principles on the Christian practice of spiritual direction.

In the monasteries, he established mentoring. Each novice was assigned to an elder monk for supervision. Cassian's precepts were incorporated into what is now known as the Rule of Saint Benedict by Benedict of Nursia.

Spiritual direction is common in the Catholic tradition: a wise and spiritually discerned person, generally but not always a priest or a consecrated person in general, counsels a person who aspires to embark on a journey of faith and discover God's will in his life. The spiritual guide's goal is to identify and grasp what the Holy Spirit is telling the person accompanied via life events, spiritual insights gained through prayer, reading, and meditation on the Bible. The spiritual father or spiritual director may give advise, give life and prayer hints, and resolve doubts in areas of faith and morals without taking the place of the accompanying person's choices and judgments.

How often should you meet with your spiritual director?

How frequently should we gather for spiritual guidance? The standard meeting schedule is once a month, although there may be periods or seasons when meeting twice a month or every other month is more appropriate and beneficial.

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Can spiritual directors help?

For those who cannot afford to pay, some directors provide pro gratis services. The relationship between companion and seeker is personal, and spiritual directors must establish proper limits, just as they would in any other type of counseling.

What should I look for in a spiritual director?

When we think about spiritual directors, we could picture a person or people who have accomplished a great deal. We can imagine a fearless commander directing us through dangerous terrain or a warrior slaying our foes in front of our eyes. A superb analyzer and teacher of the spirit or a drill sergeant of the soul come to mind.

Spiritual directors, on the other hand, are just like you in terms of being human and susceptible. They are humble, prayerful people who accompany us on our journey to improving our spiritual lives and become even more committed followers of Jesus. They are there to accompany us on our path, offering their presence, a listening ear, and practical insight to aid in our spiritual development.

These are all excellent attributes to look for in a spiritual director, but you probably didn't think about the fact that the spiritual director you connect with should also be following your lead in terms of spiritual guidance.

A good spiritual director has their own spiritual director.

A good spiritual director must have his own guide in order to help someone along the spiritual path. The purpose of seeking spiritual guidance is to give oneself with a neutral viewpoint.

A good spiritual director will be known by his pastor.

You may have assumed that your parish priest would be the finest spiritual director candidate based solely on his vocation. While most priests and even religious have some spiritual counseling training, being a well-trained spiritual director may require additional preparation.

Before a spiritual director begins mentoring others, it is recommended practice for him to have permission from his pastor. This allows the pastor to attest to the spiritual director's qualifications while also providing the church with a resource for parishioners seeking spiritual guidance.

A good spiritual director is not there to make decisions for you.

A competent spiritual director isn't the person who makes all of your decisions for you. Look for someone who can advise you rather than impose so you can make an informed decision. The purpose of the spiritual director is not to tell you what to do, but to assist you in discerning the Holy Spirit's promptings and hearing God's voice. In the end, the relationship is between you and God.

A good spiritual director has suffered.

Finding someone who is familiar with suffering is extremely beneficial and virtually necessary, as pain is unavoidable in the life of a Christian who wishes to follow in Christ's footsteps. Someone who has been converted into Christ's image through suffering is a wonderful spiritual director.

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Someone who has been shaped by the pain God has allowed in life is qualified to be a competent spiritual director. A person who has come to understand that suffering is not a sign of God's rejection of them, but rather a grace and a demonstration of Christ's faith in them.

A good spiritual director is a person of prayer

Finally, ensure that your spiritual director is a prayerful person with a strong spiritual life. Nobody can share something they don't have.

What does a deep spiritual life entail? Visiting Jesus in devotion and regularly attending mass (perhaps even daily). A good spiritual director makes time for personal prayer or meditation every day. They have studied spiritual masters such as Therese of Lisieux, Teresa of Avila, and John of the Cross. They may also have a close relationship with the Blessed Mother, who is our most powerful intercessor, and may pray the rosary or other Marian devotions frequently. Feel free to inquire about a potential spiritual director's spirituality.

Can you make a living as a spiritual director?

Teresa Blythe is one of the presenters in the Making a Living as a Spiritual Director webinar series, which is now available in online recordings. The Making a Living as a Spiritual Companion 2 webinar series from this year is also available online. Take a peek at these new additions as well: Spiritual directors and spiritual companions will benefit from the books Follow Your Calling Without Quitting Your Job and Consciously Change Your Money Relationship.

“Can you make a living as a spiritual director?” I'm frequently asked. The answer is complicated since it relies on the individual, the market, and the philosophy. Spiritual Directors International has two webinars on the subject (one of which I participated to), and if you watch both of them, which I hope you do, you will receive the long answer to your question.

Can it be done?

Yes. However, developing a spiritual direction practice to the point where you can earn a middle-class wage may take years. You may receive a few inquiries after you start promoting, but your practice will really take off once people who have come to you for advice start referring their friends. Your most effective marketing weapon will always be word of mouth, and it will take time.

But I heard about this one person who is making good money at it!

Contact him or her immediately to learn how they achieved it and how long it took them to reach to the point where they could support themselves only through spiritual direction.

The majority of spiritual directors I know who make a living at it do one of three things:

  • Working a second or third job to supplement your income. (And, full transparency, I have a working spouse and we are a two-income family with no children.) As a result, I'm not going into this without a safety net.) In addition to seeing roughly 25 people in one-on-one spiritual direction, I also manage the Hesychia School, a spiritual direction training program, and I take on contract work from churches that ask me to assist them with discernment. A full-time spiritual director friend of mine formerly rented a big multi-room space and sublet it to other spiritual directors and healing arts practitioners for sessions, retreats, and workshops. (Her name is Amanda Petersen, and she appears in part 2 of SDI's webinar series on the topic.) You'll like hearing about her adventures!)
  • Session fees are being charged at a higher rate than usual. There will be no condemnation here! However, if you want to make a living seeing individuals once a month (the standard frequency), you'll need a large number of directees or charge them upwards of $150 per session. Spiritual direction sessions in Phoenix, where I live, cost $60-80 per session. I've decided to charge the market rate. Even with a sliding scale, I believe that if I went for the upper end, I would price myself out of the medium and lower middle-class market.
  • Individuals are being seen more frequently than once a month. To put it another way, we spiritual directors build a practice in the same manner that a therapist or life coach does. They see folks on a more regular basis than once a month. As a result, if you start meeting them every two weeks, you'll be able to earn more money. Unless the directee insists on visiting more frequently, I've decided to keep appointments at around once a month (which is not usual in my case). Most directees need around 30 days of living and completing their spiritual practices before they are ready to spend one hour in direction, according to my experience. This is not the case for all filmmakers. You might try to reach out to some spiritual directors who visit individuals more frequently than once a month and ask them why they do it and how it's going for them.

It's a matter of discernment

Spend a lot of time in prayer, thought, and discernment before quitting your day job and starting a spiritual direction practice.

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Spend time with the Divine, asking questions and listening for responses from the depths of your being.

  • How many clients do I need at my target price point to pay my bills and live a life that is sustainable?
  • What is the pricing range that I am looking for? What are the advantages and disadvantages of pricing my product lower or higher than the market rate?
  • What kind of employment will afford me the independence and provide me with enough energy to see customers if I take on a job to anchor and support this practice?

Pay attention to your gut instincts. “Why am I seeking spiritual direction in this manner?” you might wonder.

Make a test run. Let's see what happens if you start marketing yourself. It's a good indication if you're inundated with people seeking spiritual guidance. It's not only fine if it takes a while; it's the standard. The majority of spiritual directors I know had to wait for the practice to mature.

Is it possible to make a living as a spiritual advisor? I hope you are able to do so. One of the reasons I do what I do is to show people that spiritual direction can be a significant component of what you do professionally. It doesn't have to be a second job any more!

What are the quality of a spiritual leader?

Spiritual leaders are not often found in religious organizations. This is more of a distinction than a criticism. People can be liberated from unreasonable expectations of some leaders by distinguishing spiritual leadership from other forms of leadership.

At the same time, making this distinction might aid in identifying who your organization's spiritual leaders are. The following are six characteristics that most spiritual leaders share:

  • They inspire others to have their own spiritual encounters with God. One of the most powerful aspects of Jesus' conduct was that He did not shift gears to introduce His disciples to the reality of God.

Interacting with the Father was so natural that people around Him couldn't help but do the same, whether they were standing in the synagogue or gathering wheat along the route. Whether a spiritual leader is onboarding a new employee or working through a difficult issue, his followers will grow closer to God as a result of the experience.

  • They help others find their own sense of purpose and identity. Spiritual leadership is marked by a high level of charity. A spiritual leader truly desires for others to fully realize who they were created to be.

Workplace challenges and strategic development become tools for followers to uncover their own identity and overcome roadblocks. People who work in areas where they have developed their own identity and strength will always be more productive than those who are merely striving to fill a position or duty.

  • Not only do they lead others into transformation, but they also lead others into output. Production will always be a natural outcome when the goal is spiritual growth and wellbeing. When people operate from a place of identity, they perform at their best.

Assisting your followers in realizing that their own transformation is possible on the job can increase loyalty and morale. Spiritual leadership inspires followers to be passionate about what they do. The component that transforms people and organizations from production to transformational effect is passion.

  • They have an effect on their surroundings. While words alone cannot stop a storm, spiritual leaders realize that they may alter the “temperature” of a room, encounter, or relationship.

Changing the atmosphere is similar to casting vision, only it is instantaneous. When there is tension, anxiety, or indifference, a spiritual leader may restore vision, vigor, and hope by transforming the immediate force of these storms. Even when saying difficult things, a spiritual leader may fill a room with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, and gentleness.

  • They assist individuals in seeing old things in new light. Many people are caught in their viewpoints and mindsets, not in their situations. “To think differently, or to think in a different way” is what the term “repent” means. Jesus urged people to reconsider old truths with fresh eyes. Meaningful change is always preceded by a shift in mindset.
  • They achieve popularity as a result of who they are rather than a job they have. Secular organizations can have spiritual leaders, just as religious organizations can have managers and organizational leaders.

Spiritual leaders inspire rather than instruct, and they influence rather than direct. They have an innate understanding that they are serving something—and Someone—far greater than themselves and their personal goals.

Question: In your life, who has served as a spiritual leader? What distinguishes this individual from other leaders? By clicking here, you can leave a remark.

What questions does a spiritual director ask?

People frequently find it easy to answer the first few questions. They do not make people nervous or perplexed. These questions provide a foundation for the spiritual director to learn about the person and his or her spirituality. Leading questions aren't the same as starting questions. When someone wants a certain answer, they ask leading questions. On the other hand, there are no correct solutions to these questions. A person can reply in any way they want without fear of being judged.

What is the purpose of a spiritual director?

Spiritual directors assist people examine issues of the soul, faith, and God by leading them on their spiritual journeys. Spiritual guidance is a practice that can be found in a variety of religious systems.

Why is spiritual direction important?

Spiritual direction has been a source of nourishment for Christians for millennia.

Spiritual direction is a type of soul care in which a person interacts with another Christian for the sole goal of analyzing his or her personal relationship with God.

The spiritual director's role in the meeting is that of a facilitator, assisting the person in focusing on what God is doing in their life. They may be referred to as spiritual guides, spiritual advisors, or spiritual partners (3), but they are not a spiritual authority figure in the directee's life (2).

It is critical to remain centered in one's faith and understanding of what God is doing in order to be effective and available to others in ministry. When a Christian's life is coming apart or they need a clear understanding of God's presence and action in their lives, they can turn to a spiritual director (3).

Spiritual direction is crucial because it assists the individual on their spiritual path, making it less lonely. It can also increase one's awareness of God's presence in one's own life (2).

When it comes to spiritual guidance, pastoral counseling, and psychological counseling, what's the difference?

Spiritual direction's objective is to assist a person in discovering how God is operating in their lives and facilitating a creative and loving response to God.

Pastoral counseling focuses on living a life that is founded on the Bible. The person is aided and encouraged to have a better understanding of God's grace and love on a personal level.

Psychological counseling aids in the development of increased personal understanding and freedom of choice as a result of improved self-awareness (3).

The goal of spiritual direction is for the client to encounter God in their daily lives, therefore the spiritual director offers a secure environment in which the client can honestly reflect on what God is doing in their lives while also listening to what God is saying to them. There is no fixed schedule or technique for spiritual direction; it is likely to include talk, quiet, readings, and prayer (2).

It is critical to listen in order to improve one's relationship with God. People seek spiritual direction for a variety of reasons, one of which is to enhance their listening abilities, as it is through hearing that we discover what God is up to in our lives. This understanding will then assist a person in spiritual growth (2).

Spiritual direction is open to anybody seeking a deeper relationship with God, but because the focus is on reflecting on one's faith journey, it will be more beneficial to those who are not new to Christianity.

In fact, for Christian leaders who want to improve in their relationship with God, it can be a useful tool. C.S. Lewis is claimed to have met his spiritual director once a week for 11 years, with their relationship ending only when the spiritual director died.

Spiritual direction can benefit Christians in leadership roles because of the loneliness and isolation they may feel; it allows them to focus on their life and God while also allowing them to privately partner with the spiritual director on challenges they may be facing. Furthermore, it allows the leader to be accountable to someone for what is going on in their spiritual life (2).

It's worth noting that spiritual orientation is moving away from simply talking about God and toward meditating on one's experience with God. Individuals report improved awareness of God and spiritual growth as a result of spiritual direction; many report greater freedom in their relationship with God, enjoyment of God, understanding of God, and clarity of what God is doing. They also express a deep sense of calm in their life as a result of their spiritual direction experiences (2).

It's crucial to understand that spiritual direction is not the same as discipleship, counseling, or preaching.

In a nutshell, spiritual direction is a ministry of support in which one person goes alongside another on their faith journey.

Spiritual direction, a focused ministry of listening, prayer, and conversation, is a refreshing, pleasant experience in our contemporary “introspective individualistic age,” where many believe they don't need anyone to accompany them on their journey (1).

B Th (Hons), M Counselling, Dip Youth Work, Dip Youth Justice, Dip Couns, Dip Pentecostal Theology, Dip Ministry. Author: Corey Human, B Th (Hons), M Counselling, Dip Youth Work, Dip Youth Justice, Dip Couns, Dip Pentecostal Theology, Dip Ministry. PACFA and CCAA member.

In both English and Afrikaans, Corey Human has nearly 20 years of experience giving counseling to teenagers, adults, couples, parents, and families. His goal in relationship counseling and teaching is to equip each couple with the tools they need to heal themselves when their relationship is at a crossroads.

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