However, asking someone to mentor you can be awkward after all, this is a major favor to ask. So, before you drop the question, see if there are any signs that someone would be willing to mentor you. Is this person genuinely interested in you and your profession? Have you ever had conversations about work-related issues that resulted in actionable items for you? Has he or she shared professional expertise with you in a kind and supportive manner? When you ask for help, has your possible mentor been ready to patiently spend time with you to help you improve your skills? Is this person qualified/experienced enough to deal with your specific mentoring issues?
Before You Continue...
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If that's the case, you've undoubtedly found someone who would be an excellent mentor. Your goal should be to build on the positive connections you've already had to establish a more structured learning relationship. And it all starts with you figuring out what your relationship's goals are, how you'll arrange your work together, and what you'll specifically want your mentor to do.
Identifying your mentoring goals and relationship
Do you want to get some advice on how to improve your communication style? Are you looking for advice on a possible promotion opportunity? What advice do you have for the next steps in your career? Do you need assistance honing your leadership skills?
You'll want to be specific about the reason for your mentoring request so that your possible mentor knows how he or she can help or even if he or she can help at all.
Are you intending to meet for coffee and discussion once a week, once a month, or on some other schedule to structure your work together? (Of course, this is contingent on your mentor's availability, but it's helpful to give a sense of what you were thinking.)
Are you searching for general advice on your main concerns, reading and/or resource recommendations, professional connections, suggested actions to take/practice, or some other sort of coaching?
Posing the mentoring question
You're ready to ask someone to mentor you if you've thought through these issues. Here's how you can do it:
Make an appointment for a first meeting. Inquire with your possible mentor about scheduling a 15- to 30-minute meeting with you. You don't want to be rushed, and you want enough time for the other person to ask you questions about your ambitions, objectives, and so on.
Clearly state what kind of help you're looking for. This is when your prior brainstorming will come in handy in articulating exactly what you're thinking about.
Confirm your commitment to doing the required work and following through. There's nothing more annoying than mentoring someone who doesn't put in the effort required to benefit from advise, so make it obvious to your potential mentor that you're willing to put in the time, energy, and effort required to benefit from their advice (and time).
Recognize and value the time of the individual. Most people who are requested to be mentors are at the top of their professions, which means they are incredibly busy and in high demand. As a result, it's critical that you acknowledge that reality and express your gratitude for their consideration of your request. This is also a nice technique to give the other person an excuse to decline your offer by citing an overbooked schedule.
Susan, I've liked and learnt a lot from our previous chats, and I'd like to ask a favor of you based on my admiration for the way you've built your profession. I'm at a point in my career where I believe I may benefit from some mentoring in order to more effectively build my management skills in order to advance to a directorship position.
I was hoping we could meet for coffee every two weeks for roughly 90 minutes to share your advice on topics I should address. For each meeting, I would prepare a meeting agenda, develop a list of any follow-up items that arose from our conversations, execute the action items over the next two weeks, and report on my progress. I'll set aside at least five hours per week to follow up on the topics we discussed.
I understand that your schedule is extremely hectic, therefore I completely understand if you are unable to fit this type of commitment into your other activities. In any case, thank you for taking the time to consider my request, and I look forward to our occasional talks!
You've demonstrated that you've done the necessary groundwork by outlining goals, providing a framework, and promising to follow through on your talks with this request. This will give your potential mentor confidence that you'll make the most of his or her involvement in your professional achievement.
Kim Dority is the founder and president of Dority & Associates, Inc., a content planning and development firm based in Colorado, and the author of Rethinking Information Work and the LIS Career Sourcebook (Libraries Unlimited, 2006 and 2012).
How do you ask someone to be a mentor examples?
Hello, I admire your work. I've been reading your blog for a long now, and I especially liked. I just wanted to say hello since I'm a big fan of the work you've been doing and I'm seeking for someone to mentor me on the subject of.
Is it weird to ask someone to be your mentor?
When we first considered creating Mentorloop, it was with the goal of making mentoring more accessible to a wider range of people.
Personally, I'd done a decent job of establishing what I now refer to as a professional network. Those with whom I came into contact in a professional setting, such as at work or at networking events. I nurtured these ties, and while I didn't realize it at the time, I was building a network of mentors to whom I could turn for career assistance.
But when I left the corporate world and launched my own company, I realized I was on my own.
That's not to imply the links were no longer necessary. They simply weren't representative of the kind of guidance I required at the time. I needed to speak with other founders, people who had been down the road I was going to take but where should I begin? Mentorloop was born in part as a result of this personal experience.
Now that we've been on the road for a while, I'm still looking for mentors and am willing to share my knowledge if I believe I have something to contribute.
However, I believe that some people have mastered the art of mentoring, which entails recognizing, asking for, and sustaining a mentoring connection, as well as developing a personal advisory board that you can call on as needed.
I never wanted to be left exposed like that again after that. As a result, I work hard to keep my network current, relevant, and tight. I have a small group of individuals who I trust, appreciate, and respect, and who I can turn to for guidance on a wide range of issues that I face as a founder – HR, sales, customer success, finance, SaaS metrics, and leadership.
When I meet someone who fits into one of these categories and we strike up a rapport, I ask them to be my mentor. “So how do you make someone your mentor?” one of my team members genuinely asked just the other day.
It caught me off surprise because I'd never given it any thought before. It's something I just do. I believe there is a level of confidence since I don't hesitate to ask someone, but I don't believe it is the whole picture. Something I now take for granted was once something I had to learn how to accomplish.
I've gotten a lot better at identifying people who can help me (both short and long term) and wording the request in a way that makes it difficult for them to say no. Because it's a learned behavior, anyone can do it.
To help you get started, I've included some tips below on how to approach someone to be your mentor and receive a yes!
- Determine your ‘why': Before you can identify the perfect mentor, you must have a clear idea of what you want to accomplish. Having a clear why helps to construct a picture of the mentor who is best placed to help you and make an impact on your life, whether it is a talent you want to master, something you want to challenge yourself in, or someone who has had to walk a route similar to you.
- Examine your current network: your mentor may be closer than you realize. Approaching someone who already knows you and possesses the knowledge you seek will almost certainly result in a positive response. If you're not sure where to start, look below.
- This is why you need a why: to find the mentor you haven't met yet. Cold outreach to folks you think might make terrific mentors is never a good idea. However, if you structure the outreach around what you want to accomplish and why you believe this individual can help, your odds of them saying yes will increase slightly.
- Play it cool: No one wants to marry on their first date, and mentoring is no different. Setting your sights on someone is OK, but don't go in with all guns blazing. Instead, ask for only a one-time piece of advise. You may offer to buy them coffee or just have a '15-minute discussion' with them. Everyone has 15 minutes to spare to assist someone, and if they don't, they won't be a good mentor candidate.
- It's fine to inquire if you'll be my mentor: It may take one meeting or a few, but you'll have a clear sense of if this person is someone with whom you want to continue a relationship or if it's time to go on. At this point, I always find that a direct approach is ideal. Recount your prior encounters, describing how much you loved them, how they've directly helped you, and how you've utilized their guidance in your business or life while putting up your ‘ask.' This is an example of what it could be:
I wanted to send you a little note to express my gratitude for taking the time to meet with me and share your thoughts. Your candid and open input has been invaluable to me. It has given me the confidence to consider the next steps I want to take in my career thoughtfully. Your extensive industry experience has also aided me in determining where I can best provide value everything you've shared has been quite valuable.
I'd love to keep in touch with you if you're available. To be honest, I see you as a mentor, and if you're open to it, I'd love to continue our chats in this capacity. It doesn't have to be anything official; perhaps a monthly check-in to keep you informed about my progress, followed by something more “as and when needed.” Please don't feel obligated, but I believe it would be a waste if I didn't ask!
Make sure you're a proactive mentee; you requested this chance, therefore it's up to you to set the agenda. If you're not sure where to begin, use our first meeting checklist to help you get started.
Hopefully, the mentor has declined graciously and for good reason. If they don't, they aren't the ideal fit for you. Consider it a learning opportunity and consider what you could do differently next time. And, if you're ever asked to be a mentor, go back to a time when you were told no. It's fine to decline, but don't leave someone in the dark. Give them a rationale for this, and if you can, point them in the direction of a mentor who can help them.
Mentorloop makes it simple for businesses to establish a mentoring culture. The fear of getting started can be reduced by creating a space for people to be open to mentoring relationships from both sides.
What is the role of a spiritual mentor?
Someone who cares about you and wants the best for you is a spiritual mentor. They understand that having a personal relationship with Christ is the most essential thing in life, so they encourage you to invest in it. As a result, you will be able to progress spiritually and in your religion.
Grand Canyon University's College of Theology provides a variety of transformative degrees with real-world applications, including graduate degrees from Grand Canyon Theological Seminary. Visit our website or click the Request More Information tab at the top of the page to learn more.
What to talk about with a spiritual mentor?
The term “spiritual disciplines” may sound scary, but it simply refers to the spiritual habits we develop in order to connect with God. Prayer, reading the Bible, fasting, and giving money are all spiritual disciplines through which God meets each person individually. Inquiring into your mentor's unique ways of encountering God on a daily basis can provide you with encouragement as well as a larger understanding of how God operates in the world.
What are good questions to ask a mentor?
- What is the best advise you can give to assist people plan their careers rather than just working to stay employed?
- What do you do to test your core beliefs and assumptions on a regular basis?
How do you politely ask for help in a message?
I'll provide some frequent terms and collocations in this session to assist you successfully ask for help in English. I'll go through the modal verbs you can use to ask for aid, as well as some extremely popular expressions. Like:
All of these phrases will come in handy when seeking assistance from a native English speaker. Have you heard of the HiNative app, which helps people out? You can get guidance from native English speakers and assist those who are learning your native language by using it.
It's an app that functions similarly to a language exchange between native speakers of any language. You can ask a question, and members of the community who are native speakers will assist you with answering it.
So, you've probably come across English phrases that you can't look up in a dictionary. Some strange song lyrics or a random line from a movie. When a dictionary fails, HiNative can help you find the answers. So, let's assume you're Spanish and you heard certain words in an English song that you didn't quite comprehend.
It's like having a native English-speaking friend you can call on at any moment for assistance! You type your question, and a native English speaker will respond, generally within a few minutes. To gain feedback on your pronunciation, you may even upload a voice tape.
Chilling entails unwinding. A Snuggie is a type of super-comfy clothing that resembles a blanket. So “chillin' in my Snuggie” refers to unwinding while wearing one. Cool!
You can also assist other persons learning your original language if they have questions. It's fantastic! It's completely free to download and use on any smartphone! HiNative makes getting help from native English speakers a breeze!
So, how do you ask for aid when you need it? Let's start from the beginning. When asking for aid, there are a few modal verbs that come in handy.
Other modal verbs can be used, but these three are the most prevalent when seeking assistance. It's a good idea to say “would you mind” if you need to be really courteous while asking for help, such as when speaking with a colleague, boss, or customer.
When you use the phrase “would you mind,” notice how the verb form changes. The main verb is in the -ing form at all times. As a result, these modal verbs are frequently used to ask for assistance. But what about the other expressions I listed at the beginning of the video?
(To) give (someone) a hand / (To) lend (someone) a hand
This is yet another very typical manner of requesting assistance in English. This is a phrase I frequently use.
It's a laid-back, unobtrusive method to seek assistance. It's usually utilized when what you're asking for doesn't necessitate a lot of effort on the part of the person you're asking for assistance. Here are several additional examples in a variety of settings and tenses.
Thank you very much for assisting us yesterday! Moving furnishings into the new flat was made easier by my brother's assistance.
To help someone out
This phrasal verb can be used to ask someone to do something for you or to assist you in solving an issue. However, you must usually state who need assistance. As an example,
(To) help out
Those were all transitive phrasal verbs, by the way. I informed you who was getting assistance. However, “help out” can also be intransitive, but only when the context makes it clear who is being assisted. So allow me to demonstrate with few examples.
Is it possible for you to work in the shop on Tuesday? I understand that's your typical day off… Sure, I'm willing to assist!
I understand you have a lot going on right now. Do you want the kids to pitch in tomorrow?
You can now include ‘with' to indicate the type of assistance you require. As a result, the structure is to assist with something or to assist someone else with something.
My brothers and I are fortunate in that our parents are usually willing to help us out financially when we are in need.
Okay, here's a fun expression that you may use to beg for aid. I'm curious whether you're familiar with it.
(To) do (someone) a favour
Please do me a favor. What exactly is a favor? Well, it's something you can do to assist someone else. And it isn't specific, but you can ask someone to do you a favor that will benefit you by saying, “Could you do me a favor?” or “May I beg a favor of you?”
These are excellent statements to employ when asking for assistance. You can owe someone a favor after you've asked someone for one. You owe me a favor.
So, if you've helped me before and I want to repay the favor and show you how much I appreciate it, I might say “I owe you a favor.” It's now my turn to help you out.
In fact, if you wish to do anything for someone who helped you previously, you can say “let me return the favor.” Someone who has previously aided you. “I'd like to repay the favor,” you can say.
It's important to remember that favors are a countable noun when discussing them. When discussing a single favor, you must include the word ‘a.' These collocations must also be remembered. These are the terms you'll frequently hear and see used in a positive light.
I could use some help
This term is rather ambiguous; it does not specify what kind of assistance you require or from whom you require assistance. It's also handy in a professional setting when you don't want to ask for aid but yet need assistance. You may use “I could use your aid” instead of “some help” to make this request a little more direct. The modal verb in this statement must be ‘could.' If you say “I could use your aid,” it doesn't sound correct.
I could use a hand
That's all there is to it! In English, there are five natural ways to ask for assistance. Idiomatic expressions and phrasal verbs, such as those used in this lesson, are a little more difficult, but try to concentrate on them this week.
You should seek assistance from as many individuals as possible, and you should also offer assistance to others! It will be excellent preparation. As a bonus, I'll share an amusing expression about assistance with you.
It's utilized when two people aid each other and thereby benefit from each other's efforts. They're both getting something out of it. This is exemplified by the HiNative app. When you receive assistance from a native English speaker, you might repay the favor by assisting them in understanding a phrase in your own tongue. Everyone comes out on top!
Thank you for watching, and I'll see you for another class next week. For the time being, bye!
What qualifies someone as a mentor?
A mentor is someone who helps you succeed in your job by giving you the tools, advice, support, and feedback you need. They're usually someone who's been down the same path as you and can “advise you on what they've done and what's worked for them,” according to Muse career counselor Brad Finkeldei.
A buddy, a friend of a friend, a family member, an alumnus of your school, a coworker or peer, a current or past supervisor, or someone you met at a networking event can all serve as a professional mentor. A mentor isn't someone you look up to from a distance. They should be able to maintain a regular presence in your life over time.
Al Dea, the creator of CareerSchooled and a Muse career coach, explains why having a mentor in your work is beneficial.
They're first and foremost knowledge and opportunity centers, he argues, since they may “give you with insights, context, and experiences that you may not have at all or have limited visibility into.” Furthermore, having a mentor “may help you become unstuck” when you're having trouble coming up with a solution to an issue or making a decision.
Having a mentor also aids in the development of your professional network because they may know or be linked to people who can assist you in the future.
(Of course, being a mentor has its own set of advantages, such as leadership development, access to new professional contacts and possibilities, and the satisfaction of contributing to someone else's success.) It's actually a two-way street!)
How do you start a mentoring relationship?
- Establish ground rules for how frequently you will communicate and how promptly you will answer.
- How many times will we attempt to communicate? (In the very least, once a month, and preferably more at the start.)
- What are our expectations for how the two of you will communicate (officially or informally)?
- Make a list of the questions you have. As the program progresses and your relationship grows, add to your list.
How do you connect with a mentor?
The data on the benefits of mentorship is clear: people who have mentors perform better, advance in their careers faster, and have a better work-life balance. Mentors benefit as well. “To teach is to learn twice,” after all. Despite these advantages, and despite the fact that 76 percent of working professionals believe that having a mentor is vital for advancement, more than 54 percent do not have one.
The issue is that many people don't know where to look for a mentor or how to start a relationship with one. The eight steps below can assist you.
1. Establish your objectives and requirements.
Make a list of your career objectives using a pen and paper. Check to see if they're SMART. Then, make a list of some of the most significant roadblocks to attaining them. This detail will assist you in determining the type of mentor you should seek. Perhaps you need to learn new skills, increase your network in a specific industry, or get the courage to undertake difficult talks. You'll see how a mentor can actually help you if you first figure out where you want to go and what the largest opportunities and gaps are for getting there.
2. Write your ideal mentor's “job description.”
Consider how a mentor can assist you once you've identified your objectives and what you'll need to reach them. Make a list of the kind of mentors who can assist you in seizing your biggest opportunities and/or navigating your toughest problems. Please be as descriptive as possible. Perhaps you require assistance with a project, introductions to people at a certain level within a particular field, or coaching during a difficult negotiation. Make sure to include the “why” in your job description just as firms want potential hires to understand the larger goal of their company, explain why mentoring you will contribute to something bigger. When you contact possible mentors, make sure to include this job description so they understand why you're looking for one and are more ready to help (covered in the 4th and 5th steps).
3. Use your second-degree network to find mentors.
Mentors come from all walks of life. They might be folks you know via LinkedIn, professional contacts, or someone you met at a conference. It's vital to remember that, while everyone is busy, being asked to serve as a mentor is a huge honor. People may say no, but it will be a positive interaction, and you should not be afraid to think big and ask for what you want, even if you believe the person will have no time for you. Let them make the decision.
4. Make the request (and keep it simple).
It's hard to ask someone to be your mentor for the first, second, or even third time. You're unlikely to have been asked to mentor someone else or instructed on how to make the request for yourself. Allow yourself to be exposed and embrace the uncomfortable feeling. There is no harm in asking, but proceed with caution. To discover more about someone's career and hobbies, have a discussion with them. If there is a fit, make a stronger request for mentorship once you've learned more about each other. It's too lot to take in to ask someone cold to be a mentor with a long email.
5. Set up an initial meeting.
For your initial conversation with your potential mentor, you have two objectives. First, you must assess whether or not this individual is the proper mentor for you. Then inquire as to whether they are interested in mentoring you. It's up to you how you approach the topic, but in general, you'll want to do the following:
- Make things simple for the individual. Come prepared, meet at a convenient place for them, have a cup of coffee (or tea) waiting for them, and make the encounter low-pressure and comfortable.
- Spend some time getting to know the individual. You probably only want to chat about 30% of the time.
- It's fine to ask for modest favors right away. In fact, it may even aid in the development of the connection.
- “I've truly enjoyed this chat,” say clearly. Is it good if I contact you again in a month after I've made some progress toward my objectives?”
6. Begin with the basics.
Keep it easy for your next meeting and follow up on your last contact. Send an email offering an agenda and hinting at a longer-term relationship once the person says they will meet with you again. Something along these lines: “I'm hoping for a quick catch-up in our next talk, and then I'd like to elaborate on our previous conversation. I'll bring some particular questions that I believe you'll be able to address.”
7. Use a mentorship agreement to create a systematic accountability procedure.
After you've had a few casual conversations, make a more formal request: Would the person be willing to meet with you once a month for the next six months until you reach your goal or solve your problem? If that's the case, make a one-page document explaining what you'll accomplish throughout your six months together. While it may appear to be a bit excessive, it will help you and your mentor communicate the relationship's aim more clearly. It will also assist you in creating a detailed agenda for each meeting. You can make the suggestion by saying: “I value your time and want to make sure I'm taking use of it as much as possible. I was thinking of putting up a short paper that would outline my objectives for the next three months, my commitment to you, and the milestones I want to attain. I believe it will motivate me to be more prepared for our discussions. “Would you mind if I did that?”
8. Continue to follow up and express gratitude.
After each meeting, you should surely send a thank-you note. After that, you should continue to express gratitude even after your mentorship agreement has ended. I once received an email from a mentee two years after our partnership ended. It made my entire week! In exchange, I was able to assist her in making some new and fascinating connections. So remember, it's fine to ask for a favor as long as you show adequate gratitude!
Making yourself, your ideas, experience, wisdom, and understanding available to your mentee is what availability means as a mentor. It also entails being open and honest with your mentee in order to foster trust and allow your mentoring relationship to thrive.
As a result, if you are a professional or an investor seeking the ideal mentor to assist you in growing your business, you must evaluate their availability. Your mentor must make oneself available in a variety of ways, in addition to making time for you and committing to one-on-one meetings. They must, for example, be emotionally available. This implies they must provide you with the essential emotional support by urging you to persevere when things become difficult.
A good mentor should listen to you and show genuine concern for your career or business, even if they are not always there to you a shoulder to weep on. They must realize that when you achieve, they will succeed as well. By observing their body language and professional behavior, you can quickly determine whether or not your mentor is emotionally available.
Another sign of a mentor's availability is their readiness to contact you outside of business hours. This can be accomplished via phone or email. Although your mentor does not have to agree to this agreement, it is best if they are available to you at important times in your business in case you need their help.
You can't be a professional mentor unless you can listen well and actively. This is the most basic technique to assisting a mentee in succeeding. Active listening is a valuable talent that is rarely taught in schools. It can only be learned via practice. As a result, when seeking for a mentor, you should assess their listening skills.
The manner your mentor responds to your inquiries will reveal whether or not they are an engaged listener. It shows they aren't paying attention to you if they continuously give you responses that leave you with more inquiries. Also, don't think your mentor is listening to you just because they are quiet most of the time. During a conversation, being quiet can signify a variety of things. It could indicate that they are considering what to say next, are preoccupied, or are pondering on what you are saying.
A mentor who is actively listening to you will steer the conversation in the right direction, avoiding closed-ended questions and dead ends. They accomplish this by posing broad questions that imply possible conversational courses and outcomes. As a mentee, you must recognize that it is not your mentor's role to provide you with advice or solutions to your difficulties; rather, they are expected to help you discover yourself.
Because time is constantly limited, you must make the most of the time you have with your mentor. As a result, your mentor must possess great analytical skills in order to comprehend your difficulties and provide the most effective solutions as quickly as feasible. They should be able to respond to your inquiries without equivocation.
A professional mentor must also stay current in order to effectively address the most recent industry concerns. They should also be adaptable enough to shift their point of view and analysis in response to industry changes. In their examination of each scenario, a good mentor should be objective and fair.
In conclusion, the three A's of mentorship are essential to every sort of mentoring. Your mentor should be accessible, analytical, and attentive to what you have to say. Your mentor won't be able to comprehend your wants or assist you in addressing challenges if you don't have these essentials. Do you have any notable business mentors you'd like to work with? Please let us know in the comments section below.