How To Do Spiritual Direction

So, what's the protocol for requesting spiritual guidance questions? Etiquette is a difficult notion to grasp. Etiquette is generally seen as a set of rules and prescribed behaviors that suffocate natural, authentic relationships between people in most of Western culture. Etiquette, on the other hand, is more than a collection of recommendations for how to act at meals or in social situations. Etiquette is just a technique of honoring someone in spiritual direction by treating them with dignity and care. Here are some pointers on how to approach your spiritual director or mentor with questions.

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  • Ask inquiries that focus on the person rather than your own biases. It has nothing to do with you. Avoid telling long anecdotes about yourself or explaining your beliefs, experiences, or religion. Withhold any reaction or question until you've given your complete attention to the speaker.
  • Keep the questions open, rather than closing them. Closed inquiries elicit a yes or no response or lead the spiritual directee to a specific conclusion. Open questions allow the spiritual directee to open up about whatever is going on inside of her or him.
  • Maintain the spiritual directee's connection to his or her spiritual journey rather than any relationship with you. Maintain a neutral, grace-filled, and welcoming demeanor. Instead of focusing on their spiritual development, some persons with attachment disorders or victim issues would strive to stay linked to and require you. They might ask you questions to boost your ego and position you as the “rescuer.”
  • Always get permission before venturing further. “Do you mind if I go into further detail? Please allow me to ask you a follow-up inquiry. Is it okay if I push back a little on that?” These aren't the kinds of inquiries that can be forced. We don't talk about it if someone says, “I don't want to talk about it.” I once had to wait a year for a spiritual directee to bring up a very challenging topic again. She was ready to bring it into the light when she brought it up.
  • It's not a race; it's a stroll. Match the person's emotional state and stamina with their pace. Trying to get the person to reveal additional information while they are depressed, exhausted, or anxious is ineffective. Simply pay attention to what he or she has to offer.

What happens during spiritual direction?

While there is some variation depending on your spiritual director's specific methods, there are mainly two types of spiritual direction: regular direction and retreat direction. They differ significantly in terms of meeting frequency and strength of reflection.

Meetings for regular direction are usually held once a month for around 50 minutes (the 50 minute hour). Each director will start the meeting in a unique way. An opening practice may be brought by a director (a reading, a meditation, a prayer, or even just centering silence). Many filmmakers utilize “deliberate devices” to emphasize the importance of the moment. This could imply lighting a candle, anointing you with oil, or using chimes or bells or some other device to signal the start of the session.

Following an introductory focus, the directee usually leads the session with their talks. During the session, the Spiritual Director is gifted and/or taught to listen for the things of God. While you speak, they are actively listening.

Each session might be quite unique. When emotions are running high, a session may progress slowly. Some directors speak more than others, and this is dependent on their personality as well as spiritual prompting.

If the directee is on a retreat (for a weekend, a week, or even 40 days), they will usually meet with their director for one hour each day. Exercises or spiritual disciplines like as lectio divina are offered to the directee as fodder to sustain his or her spiritual growth during these daily meetings. Alternatively, retreat centers frequently provide instruction or companionship to single visitors.

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Ignatius of Loyola's Spiritual Exercises are a renowned example of spiritual direction rules.

Spiritual Direction is a time set aside to listen to and pray to God. Spiritual Direction is not denominational or affiliated with any one faith, but it does require that you be receptive to the spirituality in your own life. A good director will assist you in determining whether or not they are a good match for you and your faith. In the end, you are the one doing the talking in a session, with a qualified director assisting you on your journey via discussion.

Why is spiritual direction important?

Spiritual direction has been a source of nourishment for Christians for millennia.

Spiritual direction is a type of soul care in which a person interacts with another Christian for the sole goal of analyzing his or her personal relationship with God.

The spiritual director's role in the meeting is that of a facilitator, assisting the person in focusing on what God is doing in their life. They may be referred to as spiritual guides, spiritual advisors, or spiritual partners (3), but they are not a spiritual authority figure in the directee's life (2).

It is critical to remain centered in one's faith and understanding of what God is doing in order to be effective and available to others in ministry. When a Christian's life is coming apart or they need a clear understanding of God's presence and action in their lives, they can turn to a spiritual director (3).

Spiritual direction is crucial because it assists the individual on their spiritual path, making it less lonely. It can also increase one's awareness of God's presence in one's own life (2).

When it comes to spiritual guidance, pastoral counseling, and psychological counseling, what's the difference?

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Spiritual direction's objective is to assist a person in discovering how God is operating in their lives and facilitating a creative and loving response to God.

Pastoral counseling focuses on living a life that is founded on the Bible. The person is aided and encouraged to have a better understanding of God's grace and love on a personal level.

Psychological counseling aids in the development of increased personal understanding and freedom of choice as a result of improved self-awareness (3).

The goal of spiritual direction is for the client to encounter God in their daily lives, therefore the spiritual director offers a secure environment in which the client can honestly reflect on what God is doing in their lives while also listening to what God is saying to them. There is no fixed schedule or technique for spiritual direction; it is likely to include talk, quiet, readings, and prayer (2).

It is critical to listen in order to improve one's relationship with God. People seek spiritual direction for a variety of reasons, one of which is to enhance their listening abilities, as it is through hearing that we discover what God is up to in our lives. This understanding will then assist a person in spiritual growth (2).

Spiritual direction is open to anybody seeking a deeper relationship with God, but because the focus is on reflecting on one's faith journey, it will be more beneficial to those who are not new to Christianity.

In fact, for Christian leaders who want to improve in their relationship with God, it can be a useful tool. C.S. Lewis is claimed to have met his spiritual director once a week for 11 years, with their relationship ending only when the spiritual director died.

Spiritual direction can benefit Christians in leadership roles because of the loneliness and isolation they may feel; it allows them to focus on their life and God while also allowing them to privately partner with the spiritual director on challenges they may be facing. Furthermore, it allows the leader to be accountable to someone for what is going on in their spiritual life (2).

It's worth noting that spiritual orientation is moving away from simply talking about God and toward meditating on one's experience with God. Individuals report improved awareness of God and spiritual growth as a result of spiritual direction; many report greater freedom in their relationship with God, enjoyment of God, understanding of God, and clarity of what God is doing. They also express a deep sense of calm in their life as a result of their spiritual direction experiences (2).

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It's crucial to understand that spiritual direction is not the same as discipleship, counseling, or preaching.

In a nutshell, spiritual direction is a ministry of support in which one person goes alongside another on their faith journey.

Spiritual direction, a focused ministry of listening, prayer, and conversation, is a refreshing, pleasant experience in our contemporary “introspective individualistic age,” where many believe they don't need anyone to accompany them on their journey (1).

B Th (Hons), M Counselling, Dip Youth Work, Dip Youth Justice, Dip Couns, Dip Pentecostal Theology, Dip Ministry. Author: Corey Human, B Th (Hons), M Counselling, Dip Youth Work, Dip Youth Justice, Dip Couns, Dip Pentecostal Theology, Dip Ministry. PACFA and CCAA member.

In both English and Afrikaans, Corey Human has nearly 20 years of experience giving counseling to teenagers, adults, couples, parents, and families. His goal in relationship counseling and teaching is to equip each couple with the tools they need to heal themselves when their relationship is at a crossroads.

Online Booking is a good way to make an appointment. M1 Psychology Brisbane can also be reached by phone at

Is spiritual direction Biblical?

Spiritual Direction is not as well known or practiced among many Christians, particularly those from an Evangelical background, as it is among Catholics and Mainline Protestants. This is not, however, a reason to try to understand how the practice works. One of the most important concepts to grasp is that spiritual direction is fundamentally a part of spiritual formation. In the Bible, spiritual formation takes place through relationships and prayer.

We can find examples of faith-filled partnerships in both the Old and New Testaments. Moses spiritually guided Joshua, Elisha spiritually guided Elijah, David spiritually guided Nathan, Paul spiritually guided Barnabas, Timothy spiritually guided Paul, Mark spiritually guided Peter… God's normal mode of operation is to guide and enlighten us through a combination of direct and indirect action; God stirs our souls, opens our minds, and gives us insights, but he also helps us make sense of them through the help of our fellow travelers, particularly those he has called and gifted to make that a primary function.

Because of scripture, the church has long recognized the importance of these connections in spiritual growth. As a result, Spiritual Direction became an institutionalized element of the monastic movement when new monks were required to meet with a spiritual guide as part of their study and prayer program. Moving forward, the church has begun to see both pastors and laypeople as being called to fill these positions.

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Traditionally, spiritual director training invites individuals to explore their own deeper faith and heritage while also exposing them to broader spiritual practice. They frequently incorporate scripture into their own devotional time, prayer life, reading, and study. The Bible may be used by a spiritual director in a session in the form of prayers to pray, readings to listen to, or even anecdotes to help the words become embodied in the life of their spiritual companion or directee.

So, if you're wondering whether Spiritual Direction is Biblical, the answer should be a resounding yes. However, the speed with which the answer was given should not be mistaken for insignificance in the application of scripture. When beginning to engage and guide a person, spiritual direction takes into account their spiritual experiences, prayer life, relationship with God, and faith tradition. God will frequently speak to them during a session, either via the director or in a way that is unique to their own particular story.

What is the difference between spiritual direction and Counselling?

Spiritual direction is usually ongoing and is part of one's inner desire to figure out “Where is God in this experience?” Counseling, on the other hand, is frequently brief and focused on a single topic. Unlike therapy, spiritual direction takes place in the context of prayer and a sense of God's presence.

What is the basic premise of the spiritual Exercises?

The many causes that compel a person to select one course of action over another are referred to as “spirits” by Ignatius. The development of discernment (discretio), the ability to distinguish between good and evil spirits, is a major goal of the Exercises. A good “spirit” can provide love, joy, tranquility, but also devastation, causing one to reflect on their lives. An evil spirit normally causes befuddlement and doubt, but it can also encourage contentment in order to prevent change. The human soul is constantly drawn in two directions: towards goodness and wickedness at the same time.

What do you talk about in spiritual direction?

People frequently find it easy to answer the first few questions. They do not make people nervous or perplexed. These questions provide a foundation for the spiritual director to learn about the person and his or her spirituality. Leading questions aren't the same as starting questions. When someone wants a certain answer, they ask leading questions. On the other hand, there are no correct solutions to these questions. A person can reply in any way they want without fear of being judged.

How often is spiritual direction?

Spiritual direction appointments last around an hour and take place once a month. It is critical to arrive on time for each appointment and to contact at least one day in advance if a rescheduling is required.

How much do you pay a spiritual director?

What is the expense of spiritual direction? An hour of spiritual direction costs roughly 50-70 dollars on average. If the expense is onerous, many spiritual directors may make exceptions.

How do I find a spiritual director?

You may already have a good relationship with your priest and feel comfortable asking him to be your spiritual director, but even if you don't, it's appropriate to ask him.

Because many parish priests are overburdened with responsibilities, it may be more effective to ask, “Is there someone you can recommend to give me spiritual direction if you are unable?”

Not only does this relieve your parish priest of stress, but it also prevents you from being disappointed if he is unable to serve as your spiritual director—and it allows him to consider making a recommendation for you.

When a good friend asked her parish priest to be her spiritual director, he was unable to do so, but he offered her the names of two other priests in her diocese who were available for spiritual direction! She was quite appreciative.

Our pastor or another priest, our confessor (the priest from whom we receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation on a regular basis), a religious (monk, friar, or nun), or an experienced and well-formed lay person could all serve as spiritual directors.

The Catholic Church's Catechism says this about seeking and finding a spiritual director:

For the sake of the common good, which is prayer, the Holy Spirit bestows the gifts of wisdom, faith, and insight on a select group of believers (spiritual direction). Men and women with such gifts are worthy servants of prayer's living tradition.

According to St. John of the Cross, anyone seeking perfection should “take care into whose hands they entrust themselves,” because “as the master is, so will the disciple be, and as the parent is, so will the son.” ‘A spiritual director should be experienced in addition to being learned and discreet… If the spiritual director has no experience of the spiritual life, he will be unable of leading the souls whom God is calling to it into it, and he will not even understand them.'

How do you become a certified spiritual director?

For the Education portion of the certification process, the CCPC has established the following requirements.

Formal classroom education in the field of spiritual direction is described as the required education. The foundation of information and skills connected with the basic functions must be addressed through education. Every aspect of your schooling must be documented.

A master's degree from a recognized accredited university with an emphasis in biblical, theological studies and a minimum of six courses in spirituality is required for accreditation. Individuals holding a baccalaureate degree in spirituality may be eligible in exceptional situations if they meet all other qualifications.